Well done...

Today's appointment with the new specialist went very well for me!  In fact, whilst I brought it, I actually never got around to getting out the weighted lap blanket I use in my appointments.  I also had low blood pressure (closer to my "normal") and an acceptable pulse.  No physical signs of agitation were present.  Given I had used my emergency inhaler just before taking my vitals, that actually was good news.

Whilst I did struggle with shame during the exam part, it did not linger even past getting off the table, much less back in the car.  Even though I haven't finished the book, Dr. Brown's research on shame really has been immensely helpful for me.  What a blessing!

A part of me wanted to shout "YES!" when she was looking in my nose, for she was a bit surprised at just how inflamed and filled with gunk it is.  Not my nose, actually, but looking on up there.  The plan is to try a different type of antibiotics to see if a change will knock out the sinus infection.  If not, the next step would be to have a cat scan of my head.  To me, that sounds expensive. so I am hoping round three of antibiotics will tip me over into health.

What I liked was how confident the immunologist was about being able to clear up the sinus infection.  She was also a bit reassuring with regard to my asthma, because I have been coughing and such more and more and that worries me.  She thinks the lesser control is simply because of the sinus infection.  Clear that up and my asthma control will improve once more.

She also took the time to demonstrate the proper way to use saline solution spray in my nostrils. I have been using that since January, because my GP asked me to do so. But the lesson helped me improve my technique.

I was rather daring and asked her if she would be willing to treat my asthma.  I don't have a specialist for that here.  She agreed and scheduled an appointment three months out, hoping that by then I will be quit of the sinus infection.  She doesn't want to do an asthma work-up with that going on, which I understand.

Mary rode with me in the car over to the pharmacy to pick up my very economical prescription and another bottle of saline spray.  She stayed on the phone with me all the way through Taco Bell, getting gas, and pulling into the garage.  I cannot put into words how less lonely that makes me feel. Plus, I got to process my appointment straight off.  What a merciful friend!

I stopped for gas on the way home, despite the tantalizing aroma of Taco Bell in my car because the light had come on whilst waiting for the surge in pricing to lower back down.  I made the extra stop because I do not have any appointments for 10 days.  I plan (hope) to get some serious resting in ... and studying.  I want to tackle the next chapter of the shame research book.

All in all, I thought I absolutely earned the Taco Bell I got on the way home with my second to last gift card.  [I shall miss my treats once those are gone.]  I really earned brownie points for working through the shame, for managing it.  Granted is it not like it was an intimate exam.  That ... well, I know I need more work.  Still, it was a beginning for me.

Well done, Myrtle!