That special paint that I used on the steps?? Well, it is recommended to let it "cure" for five blooming days! I am not looking forward to having to enter my basement from the outside of the house all that time. So, I stocked up on extra mason jars of Spicy Dr Pepper Pulled Pork for tacos and Chipotle Chicken Chili. I also did all the laundry on hand, save for the painting clothes I was wearing today.
Before closing the door to the basement and putting a note on it to remind me not to go down there until Sunday, I took another photo to see if I could show the color better.
Or maybe I just wanted to show you that the shop vac is finally put away (emptied and with a clean reusable filter whilst the dirty-now-clean one is drying in the kitchen) and (use your imagination here) everything in the basement is back in it place and the space is spic and span. Of course, this is still a photo of wet paint that will dry darker ....
I forgot to mention that I tried a new recipe: Dr Pepper Oatmeal Cake.
It is from one of my most favorite recipe blogs, Homesick Texan, even though I am still trying to track down peppers for most of the recipes I chose. I just love how she understands missing Texas and its food. Ah, Ninfas!!
Now, of course I changed the recipe. It had coconut and nuts in the icing! ICK!!! I did have a moment of utter panic because I thought that the recipe called for it to cook 25-35 minutes. At 25 minutes, the cake was still very jiggly. Even at 35 minutes, it was not done. My pan is actually 8.5 x 8.5 inches, so I was certain I had ruined the recipe by not using the proper pan. However, when I typed up the recipe for my recipe rememberer blog, I realized that all my panic was for naught. I had read the instructions wrong; you cook it for 35-45 minutes. So, my 40 minutes of nail-biting cooking was par for the course. But I will note that there was nothing in the instructions about waiting until the cake is cool before you cut it.
Uhm, well, I would highly recommend that you let your cake cool before you cut it.
Amos thinks it is tasty. No one else in my life here has tried it yet.
I am trying to gird my loins to roast rutabaga, and I am on the prowl for a really good roasted carrots recipe. I found another muffin recipe to try (blueberry, lime, oatmeal), but I need blueberries. I also found a recipe for white chocolate cherry oatmeal cookies, but I am steadfastly ignoring it whilst I continue my search for some more vegetable options that look palatable to this slightly picky (translate that super finicky) vegetable eater.
I did some spec work for bartering that I am crossing my fingers will be acceptable. [I don't think crossing your fingers is a faithful thing to do, right?] First is another article. My last topic was Visual Rest, which I thought was a fairly good piece. This one is on Choosing a Contractor. It is rather restrained, considering what I went through last summer, but I do believe that is it comprehensive even though it is a one-pager. I covered licenses, references, contracts, insurance, permits, payments, and waiver/release of lien. I liked my last sentence: In sum, the sign of a good contractor is one who helps obtain and maintain proper documentation throughout all phases of the project.
The second piece was a newsletter template. I know that what I did would be helpful and move the business in a more positive direction marketing wise, but I just am not sure how it will be received.
Monday, I also mailed off a volunteer project that is near and dear to my heart. The author has this great paper on spiritual care for the deeply wounded (despairing, depressed, and/or suicidal) that I think would make a fantastic resource if formatted into a booklet. Since the work is not mine, I cannot just create a booklet and post it even thought the paper is available online. So, actually, all my fingers and toes are crossed, hoping that the author likes my idea. If so, I offered to do booklets of others papers on spiritual care if wanted.
Of course, that leaves me projectless on all fronts. Amos about near cried in relief when I climbed into the GREEN chair this evening. I agreed with him about being too busy of late for my health, but being too busy helped my mental well-being. Sort of. A little.
Actually, I do have a project. It is for my best friend Rebecca Anne Bettina Matilda Boyles Kulp. But it is so important to me to get it right that I am too scared to try. SIGH.
My friend Mary asked me if I was listening to music. She tried to remind me of a CD that I liked a lot and even played when I went to counseling, but, of course, I have no idea of what she means. I have been listening to music. Then, Mary gave me a verse. A very interesting verse: "And whenever the harmful spirit from God was upon Saul, David took the lyre and played it with his hand. So Saul was refreshed and was well, and the harmful spirit departed from him" (1 Samuel 16:23).
For hours I wondered what David played and if he sang. I wondered if he sang any of those psalms that are marked for the stringed instrument since a lyre is a stringed instrument. Mostly I wonder because so many of the songs I listen to that provide some sort of comfort ... are a kind of salve ... are secular songs. The good little evangelical in me never used to listen to secular songs. But these songs are ones I have heard on TV or in movies with lyrics that make sense to me. Some of them, I listen to as if God were speaking the words, not as (I am fairly certain) the artist meant them to be heard. Some of them, I listen to as if I am speaking the words ... though I am not always sure to whom I am speaking.
Some remind me of that which I was viewing, such as with The Calling's Wherever You Will Go. I heard it whilst watching one of the most esquisite television episodes ever ... Vincent and the Doctor. Just the first few notes call to mind that exploration of mental anguish and the words the Doctor used to comfort Amy at the end: The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. Good things don't always soften the bad things, but vice versa, the bad things don't necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant.
A few have melodies that just ... well, I find them rather beautiful and intriguing. Even though some of the songs speak of angst and anguish, none of them leave me feeling that way. Mostly, I feel less alone.
But, as I went to go type that verse, I started to panic. Why was God sending a harmful spirit to Saul?? When I first read the verse, I missed that bit. I read the verse as whenever a harmful spirit, thinking it was our foe doing the troubling. Back in the evangelical world, there was lots of talk about God troubling your waters and how that was good. I do not remember why, though. And I cannot figure out when this verse is in Saul's life. What is close to when he was losing faith? Or what it when losing faith was still a foreign concept in his life?
Becoming lost in that panic, I thought about how Mary said that hearing was passive, was not doing anything faith wise on the part of the person, so that was why it was okay for me, in my current state of mind, to still read the Bible ... or more pointedly, still hang out in the Psalter.
I would not recommend Googling about the Psalter because there is just so much crap out there about it. Really, all you need is Bonhoeffer's Treatise on the Psalms, which I used to carry with me quite often (and gave away many, many, many times). I don't really go anywhere anymore, so I stopped carrying it. When I looked up the link for here, I noted there is a Kindle version. Despite my strict budget parameters, I promptly purchased the Kindle version. Now I can go back to carrying it with me everywhere.
However, I am not writing about that. I am actually writing about something I came across online that has stuck in my mind. It is this ... lesson ... about the Psalter in which, among other things, the author states that the book of Psalms is actually 5 books and that the end of each book is a doxology, with the last one being a doxology of the entire Psalter. I actually Googled the definition of doxology and still do not quite understand it. I mean, it seems like it is the same thing as paean. Or maybe it is a liturgical paean as opposed to a non-liturgical paean. Anyway, I have been trying to view Psalms 41, 72, 89, 106, and 150 as doxologies. 150? Okay. But it seems a stretch for me on some of the others.
Avoiding thoughts of God sending a harmful spirit to me, I read through those "doxologies" again. Then, I chuckled. I thought about all those praise songs I used to hear in the evangelical church. In Psalm 72: 6, you read, "May he come down like rain upon the mown grass, like showers that water the earth." I cannot tell you which one, but I know that I used to sing that in a praise song; I can hum the tune. However, can you imagine verse 9 in a praise song: "Let the nomads of the desert bow before him; and his enemies lick the dust." Can you picture a refrain of singing "and his enemies lick the dust" three or four times??
Reading those Psalms, I wondered if Michael's Card's Job's Suite would be considered a doxology. I think it fits the pattern of some of them.
Blameless and upright, a fearer of God
A man truly righteous, no pious faćade
One about whom God was accustomed to boast
And so one whom Satan desired the most
One day the accuser came breathing out lies
It's you, holy handouts his faithfulness buys
In one desperate day his possessions were lost
His children all killed in one raw holocaust
His children all killed in one raw holocaust
And yet through it all, through the tears and pain
He worshiped his God, found no reason to blame
Once more the Deceiver denounced and decried
It's skin for skin and hide for hide
Strike down his flesh and he'll surely deny
And confess that his praying has all been a lie
Very well, take him, the Holy One sighed
But you must spare his life, my son shall not die
So Job was afflicted with terrible sores
Sat down in the ashes to wait for the Lord
Sat down in the ashes to wait for the Lord
And yet through it all, through the tears and pain
He worshiped his God, found no reason to blame
~ † ~ † ~ † ~
A throne of ashes, a crown of pain
A sovereign of sorrow, a mournful reign
A sovereign of sorrow, a mournful reign
May the day of my birth be remembered no more
May darkness and shadow come claim it once more
Why did I not perish on that dreadful day
And sleep now where kings and counselors lay?
What I dreaded most has now come upon me
Why is light given those in misery?
I loathe my own life so my tears fall like rain
As I find that there is no peace in my pain
Lord, send a comforter now to my door
So that this terror will frighten no more
A counselor between us to come hear my oath
Someone who could lay a hand on us both
These friends of mine are no comfort to me
So deafly they listen so blindly they see
Their words and their doctrine they all sound so true
The problem is Lord, they're all wrong about you!
I know my advocate waits upon high
My witness in heaven sees the tears that I cry
A true intercessor who will condescend
To plead with God as a man pleads for his friend
If I've been untrue, if I've robbed the poor
If I'm without guilt, what am I suffering for?
God would not crush me for some secret sin
And though he slay me still I'll trust in Him
I know now that my Redeemer's alive
He'll stand on the earth on the day he arrives
And though my body by then is no more
Yet in my flesh I know I'll see the Lord
~ † ~ † ~ † ~
Who is it who darkens my council
Who speaks empty words without knowledge?
Brace yourself up like a man
And answer me now if you can
Can you put on glory and splendor?
What's the way to the home of the light?
Does your voice sound like the thunder? Are you afraid?
Where were you when earth's foundations were laid?
Who gave the heart it's wisdom?
The mind it's desire to know?
Who gave the heart it's wisdom?
The mind it's desire to know?
Can you bind the stars? Raise your voice to the clouds?
Did you make the eagle proud?
Will the ox spend the night by your manger?
Did you let the wild donkey go free?
Can you take leviathan home as a pet?
If you merely touched him, you'd never forget
Who is it that darkens my council?
Who speaks empty words without knowledge?
Brace yourself up like a man
And answer me now if you can
~ † ~ † ~ † ~
I am unworthy, how can I reply?
There's nothing that you cannot do
You are the storm that calmed my soul
I place my hand over my mouth
I place my hand over my mouth
Man, what a song!
What I dreaded most has now come upon me
Why is light given those in misery?
I loathe my own life so my tears fall like rain
As I find that there is no peace in my pain
Lord, send a comforter now to my door
So that this terror will frighten no more
A counselor between us to come hear my oath
Someone who could lay a hand on us both
Did you make the eagle proud?
Will the ox spend the night by your manger?
Did you let the wild donkey go free?
Can you take leviathan home as a pet?
If you merely touched him, you'd never forget
Who is it that darkens my council?
Who speaks empty words without knowledge?
Brace yourself up like a man
And answer me now if you can
~ † ~ † ~ † ~
I am unworthy, how can I reply?
There's nothing that you cannot do
You are the storm that calmed my soul
I place my hand over my mouth
I place my hand over my mouth
Man, what a song!
What I dreaded most has now come upon me
Why is light given those in misery?
I loathe my own life so my tears fall like rain
As I find that there is no peace in my pain
Lord, send a comforter now to my door
So that this terror will frighten no more
A counselor between us to come hear my oath
Someone who could lay a hand on us both
SIGH.
Fernando Ortega, too. His Creation Song seems a doxology. It is from Psalm 104.
As with a garment,
He spreads out the heavens
And walks on the wings of the wind.
He sends forth the springs
from the valleys
The flow between moutains.
The birds of the air dwell
by the waters,
Lifting their voices in song-
Singing glory, glory!
Glory to the Lamb!
All praises and honor forever.
He made the moon for its season,
The sun knows it setting.
He looks at the Earth and it trembles,
He touches the mountains
and they smoke,
I will sing to the Lord all my life,
I will sing praises to my God -
As long as I live,
Praises to the Lord, oh my soul.
Singing glory, hallelujah!
Glory to our God!
All praises and honor forever.
Whenever I hear it, I just know the angels are singing along. True story. When I went to hear Fernando Ortega in concert, I was up in the balcony of the church where he was playing. At the end of that song, I exclaimed, "I just love that song." I spoke a that moment of dead silence and so my words were carried down to the stage. Fernando looked up from the piano to search for whomever had spoken and immediately replied, "I do, too!" I was mortified ... until he started playing the song for a second time.
Of course, the original is better.
O LORD my God, Thou art very great;
Thou art clothed with splendor and majesty,
Covering Thyself with light as with a cloak,
Stretching out heaven like a tent curtain.
He lays the beams of His upper chambers in the waters;
He makes the clouds His chariot;
He walks upon the wings of the wind;
He makes the winds His messengers,
Flaming fire His ministers.
He established the earth upon its foundations,
So that it will not totter forever and ever.
Thou didst cover it with the deep as with a garment;
The waters were standing above the mounts.
At They rebuke they fled;
At the sound of Thy thunder they hurried away.
The mountains rose; the valleys sank down
To the place which Thou didst establish for them.
Thou didst set a boundary that they may not pass over;
That they may not return to cover the earth.
He sends forth springs in the valleys;
They flow between the mountains;
They give drink to every beast of the field'
The wild donkeys quench their thirst.
Beside them the birds of the heavens dwell;
They life up their voices among the branches.
He waters the mountains from His upper chambers;
The earth is satisfied with the fruit of His works.
He causes the grass to grown for the cattle,
And vegetation for the labor of man,
So that he may bring forth food from the earth,
And wind which makes man's heart glad,
So that he may make his face glisten with oil,
And food which sustains man's heart.
And food which sustains man's heart.
The trees of the Lord drink their fill,
The cedars of Lebanon which He planted,
Where the birds build their nests,
And the stork, whose home is the fir trees.
The high mountains are for the wild goats;
The cliffs are a refuge for the rock badgers.
He made the moon for the seasons;
The sun knows the place of its setting.
Thou dost appoint darkness and it becomes night,
In which all the beasts of the forests prowl about.
The young lions roar after their prey,
And seek their food from God.
When the sun rises they withdraw,
And lie down in their dens,
Man goes forth to his work
And to his labor until evening.
O LORD, how many are Thy works!
In wisdom Thou hast made them all;
The earth is full of Thy possessions,
There is the sea, great and broad,
In which are swarms without number,
Animals both small and great.
There the ships move along,
And Leviathan, which Thou hast formed to sport in it.
They all wait for Thee,
To give them their food in due season.
Thou dost give to them, they gather it up;
Thou dost open Thy hand, they are satisfied with good.
Thou dost hid Thy face, they are dismayed;
Thou does take away their spirit, they expire,
And return to their dust.
Thou dost send forth Thy Spirit, they are created,
And Thou dost renew the face of the ground.
Let the glory of the Lord endure forever;
Let the Lord be glad in His works;
He looks at the earth and it trembles;
He touches the mountains, and they smoke.
I will sing to the Lord as long as I live;
Let my meditation be pleasing to Him;
As for me, I shall be glad in the Lord.
Let sinners be consumed from the earth,
And let the wicked be no more.
Bless the Lord, O my soul.
Praise the Lord!
~Psalm 104 (NASB 1977)
I wonder how David would have played it.
I wonder if it is something he played for Saul.
I wonder if it would have comforted him.
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