Pound foolish...

I was most certainly penny wise, but pound foolish.

Late last night on into today, I battled a migraine.  I battled a migraine without my meds.  At least I did until this afternoon.  I battled without them because, having gained such good control of my migraines, I was not paying attention to the expiration date on the meds.  And I have opted not to pick up the two prescriptions for a while.

At my last GP appointment, I did have refills sent over, but I chose not to pick them up this month.  I have been so very excited at just how miserly I've been this month and even last.  I have needed $509 to make up the missed estimate of my state taxes, and, before today's trip to the pharmacy, I had just over $300 of that.

For a while, I just didn't realize that I was getting a migraine.  Then, I admit, I tried to will it away.  After that, after full misery had set in, I gave myself a stern lecture and went to get my meds and turn off all light and sound.  When I realized that the expiration date had come and long gone on my meds, I started kicking myself.

All I could do was huddle in misery with icepacks all over my head.  I was, frankly, too afraid to call Target to get the refills, certain that the meds would need to be ordered.  Kaitlyn, the wonder pharmacist, had actually already ordered one month's worth for me.

I called around, futilely, to find someone pick up my prescriptions or drive me. Then I started calling to find someone to be on the phone with me.  Mary showed mercy that way and vicariously rode to and fro with me.  I vomited in the parking lot and fainted in the store, but I got home safely.

Most thankfully, the meds worked on the first dose, instead of the second.
I love Toradol and Summatriptan.
I love pain relief.

I had forgotten just how rotten I am dealing with the migraine pain.  How very infantile I am in my thoughts and emotions, just wanting the pain to go away.  More so than when innards writhing.  Much, much, much more so.

Tonight, I am in the still-shocked-and-physically-fragile after state, where the migraine is over and the fear of a bounce back lingers.  But I took a second shower and have heat on my neck and shoulders. I finally ate something.  And I am sitting on the couch with Amos.  Resting.

Poor little guy.

Just a while ago, he was whimpering and climbing all over the couch.  I couldn't figure out what he wanted.  Finally, he managed to climb beneath the blankets and curled up in my lap.  Amos needed to make up for all the alone time he's had not being able to be draped atop me for almost 24 hours.

I just love that that is what Amos wanted, what he needed.  I am sitting up on the couch, even though I want to be in the GREEN chair, I am not taking the risk of irritating the nerves in my head and making things worse.  Amos didn't want to be next to or draped atop the back of the couch leaning against me.  He wanted to be in my lap, holding on to my leg with his paws, and snoring against my belly.

After battling the migraine and yet another one of my stupid choices, I was most happy to have his frenetic whimpers and pawing be to show me that he needed some Myrtle time.  Even in my most miserable, pathetic, self-loathing state, Amos needs me.

And still likes me.