Tuesday, December 05, 2017

Start and stop...

Wanting to DO SOMETHING yet again, I got everything ready to continue working on the frame for the stained glass window.  From the garage, I fetched the two glass panes, the stained glass window, the under frame, and the staple gun.  From the basement, I fetched my drop cloth, pliers, primer, paint, stir sticks, paint triangles, paint brushes, liquid nails, and the doohickey you use to apply sealant or construction adhesive.  It was a lot of work to get everything set up.

I needed to adjust the inner frame, so I pulled out all the staples on the two left side corners and repositioned that piece.  Then, I stapled it back into place, and I added staples to both sides of all four corners.  Finally, I added staples to the back side of all four corners of the outer frame.

After checking and double checking that I could move the glass and the stained glass window in and out of the inner frame, I went to glue the two frame pieces together.  Sadly, the liquid nails had hardened.  It was too old.  And I had broken the 6th rule of construction projects:  Wait until the project is done before making your returns.  I bought a new tube of liquid nails, found a tube in my basement, and then returned the new one when I bought the second glass pane.

The pane of glass that I broke today.

I wanted to SCREAM.  There was no way that I was going to go out and fetch more liquid nails because I went to therapy today.  I have a test on the veins in my legs tomorrow.  And I have another doctor's appointment on Friday.  I can possibly stop by Lowe's tomorrow.  Tonight, I just have to wait.  Be patient.  I stink at that when I want to DO SOMETHING.

Since the balmy weather finally fled tonight, I decided to have a fire and concentrate on not castigating myself for breaking the pane of glass ... for wasting $14.  I am really, really, really tempted to not have a pane of glass in the back, but I do still think that having the stained glass window sandwiched between two panes of glass and sealed with clear caulk  (ah! ... doohickey = caulk gun) is the best way to protect the stained glass window outside.  So, I will be buying liquid nails and yet another pane of glass.  SIGH.

It was rather frustrating to start working and to find myself abruptly stopping.  It is not that I want to finish the project NOW, because I am not going to be able to install it without help (translate that:  without Firewood Man's drill).  But I did want to make progress.  I was hoping to get the priming done and one coat of paint.  But I do not wish to prime until the two pieces are glued together.  Or paint.  Mostly, this is because I need to be sure that gluing the pieces together doesn't make the window no longer fit into the inner frame.  Maybe that is a ridiculous worry, but it is my worry.

The fire?  Well, that was just lovely!  Firewood Man was not able to bring more wood for a couple of weeks and then we had this crazy insane balmy weather.  But tonight we had bitter cold weather due to the wild winds that started yesterday.  So, I was able to roast myself before the fireplace.

Here's a tip for you:  Don't roast your feet before a fire if you are wearing Birkenstocks.  The soles will come unglued from the heat!  Yep, my feet are so cold from Reynaud's that the heat can be intense enough to melt shoe glue and yet not even feel warm to my icy skin!!

I'm colder this winter already, but I do not know why ... unless really you blame my wonky nerves and the autonomic process that keeps you warm.  Last year, I kept the house at 55 degrees.  This year, I had to up it to 60 degrees.  And at that I am still very, very, very cold.  When my realtor comes over, I bump up the heat to 65 and only then find the temperature bearable.  However, I cannot afford keeping the house balmy this winter.  Or any winter for that matter.  But especially this winter.

Despite the cardiologist's certainty that I have venous insufficiency, I am expecting the test results to be normal tomorrow.  I still think that whatever's going on has to do with my heart.  Of course I am probably wrong, given that he is very good at his job.  But I've finally got back to walking on the treadmill and the thing that I keep seeing is that I have breathing problems when my heart rate tops about the 130s.  On the recumbent bike, I just cannot get my heart rate up high enough.  However, it isn't just standing because I can walk at a lower pace and keep my heart rate around 120 and my oxygen sats drop to 91-92, but no lower.  Once I get over 130, my sats start dropping lower and lower and breathing gets harder and harder.  Something is happening.

Of course, to be fair, I will admit that I do not hold out hope that the high resolution CT scan will give any answers either.  Mostly, I think this because, with dysautonomia, normal test results are the norm.  That's why my bum kidney blood work was so surprising to me.  I am not looking forward to the next blood test even though I've gone down—again—on the amount of Celebrex that I take.

No, I cannot think of why my overall heart rate rose in September/October, but the higher it was, the worse the breathing got with any exertion.  High is not good for me.  Why? I cannot think why sometimes my legs go from being swollen to be alarmingly doughy.  But its randomness speaks more to dysautonomia rather than the valves in my veins.

But I will use the opportunity to practice medical optimism during the testing.  Smile and nod and look hopeful!  Hah!!  SIGH.

Yep.  I'll definitely be fetching the liquid nails and glass pane on the morrow.  That way, after the testing, I can distract myself by DOING SOMETHING.  From the testing and from the comprehensive physical exam I'm having on Friday.

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