The things you endure...

Crushing headaches.
Nausea.
Tingling lips.
Weight loss.
Drowsiness.
Jerking limbs.
Yawning.
Gagging.
Dry mouth.
Numbness.
I Don't Care.

Those are the symptoms I've been battling for 11 days now.  This new drug packs a wallop.  Friday, I will be doubling the dose up to the lowest therapeutic dose for neuropathic pain.  Then, it will be a couple of months before I know if it will make a difference with the pain in my hands.

61 days.
Shock. Schock. Schock. Shock. Schock. Schock. Shock. Schock. Schock. Shock. Schock. Schock.
Unceasing.

Frankly, after all the weight gain with the gabapentin, I do not mind the weight loss.  However, I am fairly certain that it might be labeled a bit of a concern.  I am not concerned because I have LOTS of weight to lose.

I also do not mind the drowsiness in that I am sleeping longer segments at night.  I very much dislike when I awake after just an hour or ninety minutes of sleep.  Sometimes, now I am sleeping three or four hours before waking and needing to fetch fresh ice packs.

However, the drowsiness in the late afternoon/early evening means that I HAVE to take a nap.  That's because the yawning causes me to gag.  Every. Single. Yawn.  It is very, very, very difficult to continually fight back vomiting with the constant yawning.  It is easier to just give up and sleep.

The rest ... I am just trying to endure.  The hardest is feeling so numb and not caring about anything.  It is difficult to think, to talk, to do.  So, I haven't done much.  And what I have done has not gone so well ... especially my Christmas treat packages.  SIGH.

The things you endure for even the merest hope of help with your pain.  In my opinion, chronic pain is impossible to understand unless you live with it.  And I do not wish such knowledge on anyone.