Perhaps...

The pacemaker incision/scar has been the bane of my existence.  It hurts, something fierce, burns and stings and is basically a bit of misery on my chest.

My new GP advised me to start using Mederma on it.  Well, it turns out that I am allergic to Mederma.  Most likely.  I start using the stuff and then a deep red rash began spreading from my scar to my jaw and down from my scar.  Deep red, hot to the touch, bumpy, and incredibly itchy.  I have been using benedryl and cortisone cream for days and days to try and stop the rash.  It is no longer spreading and is much, much better, but it is still red, warm, and itchy.

I discovered rough, scaly patches of skin on my legs and arms that I think might be because of the beta blocker.  I don't look at myself very often, but I kept feeling something on my arm.  I finally looked at it and, well, I FREAKED OUT.  I think I might have psoriasis.  If it is the beta blocker and I stop it, then the skin condition would get better, but I would react to all beta blockers.

The cardiologist said that we could substitute a calcium channel blocker, but it would not be near as effective as the beta blocker.  And I am not thrilled with the common side effects of calcium channel blockers, being somewhat of a Side Effects Queen.  I am mulling the matter and trying to ignore those sci-fi movie patches of skin.

The flushing in my face is now daily and my skin is oft red even when it is not hot to the touch.

Basically, I feel like a freak.  A grotesque one at that.  And I am a doped-up freak, with all the benedryl, so I am not thinking all that clearly.  I took a break this morning, but I still napped most of the day because it is so very difficult to clear such drugs from my system.

This evening, with the warmer nights, I decided to see if the pile of screens in the garage fit the storm doors on my front and back door.  Yes, they did.  Yes, I fainted switching them out.  Yes, I have a nice breeze flowing from the front of the house to the back at the moment.

The screens, having been in the garage at least 5 years, if not more, are filthy.  But cleaning them would have meant hooking up one of the hoses in the dark.  I was already exhausted, so I decided to ignore the dirt for now.  Most of the work was trooping back and forth from the doors to the garage, going up and down the ladder.  I also had some very, very, very stubborn screws that kept my arms above my heart for far too long.  Those I sprayed lubricant on, so I won't have trouble when it comes time to clean the screens.  I am not sure it matters, but I did remember to mark which glass pane went to which place on what door for next fall.

Of course, if money were not an issue, I very much would like to have new storm doors since mine are ancient and decrepit.  Fantasy, I know.

I am worried about the warmer weather coming.  Already we are having higher overnight lows, which makes for a very warm bedroom upstairs.  However, the lows are not high enough for me to switch to air-conditioning.

I am worried because at all of the recent doctor's appointments I have had, the thermostats have been set to 72 degrees. I left the appointments sweating, shaking, and exhausted.  The heat is bothering me more, at lower temperatures.  To put it another way, I get sweaty and shaky puttering about the house when the thermostat rises above 65 degrees.  I am worried that my beloved AC will not be sufficient this summer when it comes to my rather warm bedroom.  SIGH.

I think, perhaps, spending days drugged on benedryl is getting to me.
I think, perhaps, I am a bit too grumpy.
I think, perhaps, I am not thinking all that clearly.