So far...I have slept late, folded five loads of laundry, washed, dried, and folded two more, changed the sheets on the bed, and ironed 10 shirts/jackets.

A great way to start a holiday weekend, eh?

I do have fourteen mosquito welts on one foot and another eight on the other. I am not sure when I was bitten, but the itchy red lumps say that I was. So, much of my work was done while trying not to scratch (I was not always successful).

My brother called. He was returning my frenetic call from Wednesday night. He asked me what I was doing and I told him that I was working up the energy to iron. He repeated what I had said as if that were crazy or weird. Other people might not have to work energy to iron, but I do. The labor and the heat takes it toll when I do. Then he asked why I had called him. I had wanted him to read what I was considering turning in as my self evaluation. When I told him that I already had to turn it in, he asked me how the review went. When I started to tell him, he cut me off saying that I was giving him too many details. He didn't know those people and never would.

I stopped short. Four people? That's too many to remember? This is my life. Work. Kashi and the birds. The house. My best friend and her husband and her daughter. Any time I try to talk about them both my mother and my brother tend to cut me off saying it was too much information. I find that so very hurtful. My world is not important to them.

When he cut me off, I grew quiet and then responded that my life obviously wasn't very important to him. My brother hung up on me.

My mother does the same.

It is hard not to be hurt, not to feel rejected, not to feel as if I do not matter.

Wiping away a few tears, I hacked on my hair for a while and then turned to the place I should have before picking up the shears. I was reading in Romans and came upon a reminder of where my hope should be...not in a family who is interested in my life...not in a job where I can make a difference...

"Therefore having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have obtained our instruction by faith into this grace in which we stand; and we hope in the glory of God. And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation bring about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us."

~Romans 5:1-5