I often wonder if is it wrong to ascribe something to God without ... knowing.
Yesterday, my GP was really, really insistent on starting Physical Therapy for the pain, since there is not a female pain specialist that I can see. She wanted to x-ray my hip to see why I was having new pain in that area with the flare I've been laboring under, but her plan was PT.
My GP also essentially forbid me to continue taking ibuprofen on top of the Celebrex. I burst into tears at her words because it is the only thing that has made this pain flare bearable. I saw this long dark path of misery ahead of me. I deal with pain every day in many parts of my body, but the level of daily pain since this flare began has been terribly difficult to swallow.
I am grumpy.
I am quick to become upset.
I am melancholy.
Today, the PT's office called for an appointment, telling me that my GP had already spoken with the therapist and the therapist's nurse to be very specific about helping me. I hemmed and hawed and felt pressured into making an appointment. So, I made one for the 17th, because I already have two appointments on the 14th and one on the 21st and I need rest and recovery time between the work of getting ready and going out to appointments.
I hung up the phone and cried again because I kept thinking, How will I pay for the appointment? As a rule, I do not charge things without a way to pay for them. And the clinic said I would have to pay up front instead of when the claim was processed and billed, as I do with all of Parkview. Setting aside the money for my next prescription and for the monthly alarm system payment, I have just $16 left for this month.
Well, a while ago I made a referral to my realtor for a guy who wants to flip houses. If all goes well, she'll be doing both transactions on each house. Tonight, she stopped by with a card, telling me that she closed on the first house. She wanted to give me a little something for the referral. In the envelope was $80. That means I can pay for two PT appointments, which, hopefully would at least net me some stretches and exercises I could do on my own.
To me, when I counted out the cash, it seemed like God was telling me not to be so hopeless about the pain.
Today, the PT's office called for an appointment, telling me that my GP had already spoken with the therapist and the therapist's nurse to be very specific about helping me. I hemmed and hawed and felt pressured into making an appointment. So, I made one for the 17th, because I already have two appointments on the 14th and one on the 21st and I need rest and recovery time between the work of getting ready and going out to appointments.
I hung up the phone and cried again because I kept thinking, How will I pay for the appointment? As a rule, I do not charge things without a way to pay for them. And the clinic said I would have to pay up front instead of when the claim was processed and billed, as I do with all of Parkview. Setting aside the money for my next prescription and for the monthly alarm system payment, I have just $16 left for this month.
Well, a while ago I made a referral to my realtor for a guy who wants to flip houses. If all goes well, she'll be doing both transactions on each house. Tonight, she stopped by with a card, telling me that she closed on the first house. She wanted to give me a little something for the referral. In the envelope was $80. That means I can pay for two PT appointments, which, hopefully would at least net me some stretches and exercises I could do on my own.
To me, when I counted out the cash, it seemed like God was telling me not to be so hopeless about the pain.
My friend Emily said that this is what is meant by praying "Give us our daily bread." I hadn't thought of that. My friend Mary reminded me that good things come from God. Of course I know that, I believe that, I can quote the verse (James 1:17), and I can even sing an old evangelical praise song about the verse! Gosh I wish my mind would remember the important things.
Definitely getting the funds for two PT appointments is a good thing.
Every perfect gift comes from the Lord
From the Father of lights
From the Lord of love
This joy that I have that I’m singing of
Is from the Lord, from the Lord
That’s where the joy comes from
That’s where the joy comes from
~Steve Green
An old professor of mine used to preach when his pastor was out of town. He would send me tapes of his sermons and in his booming southern accent, I can still hear him preach: If it's good, it's from God. Period. End of discussion. How could I forget that?
I am thankful for friends who remind me of the things of faith and teach me the things of faith.
I am thankful for a surprise thank you for the referral.
And I am thankful for the care of my Good Shepherd.
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