Here I am again...

Another week has passed.  Another week in which I cannot really tell you what has happened or what I have done.  Another week in which I am lost.  Another week in which another hearing came and went and nothing happened.  Another continuance.  Another week where I stumbled and fell.

The woman came to court with two rows of people supporting her.  Last week, when her sister stood to leave with her, the judge actually spoke.  He was very angry over her attire, a t-shirt and baggy pajama pants.  She told him that she had come from work.  He was still very angry and told her that she had better not appear in his court again without showing respect in her attire.

This week, she wore jeans--with holes--and another t-shirt.  She purposely sat in front of me.  Her t-shirt had a drawing of a snarling pit bull and the shirt read: PIT BULLS  we be off the chain!

I was paralyzed in fear.  I couldn't move.  The entire time I sat there, growing more and more afraid, unable to tear my eyes away from the face of the dog.  I cowered the entire time.  I cowered as I listened to every other case on the docket. I cowered as I listened to her say she would never pay me. I cowered as she said that her dog (yes, now it is her dog) never hurt me.  I cowered as the judge merely continued the case once more. I cowered as her mother claimed she was now pregnant and couldn't bear the hardship of coming to court. I cowered as her mother interrupted the judge to defend her daughter.  I cowered as the judge ordered her to shut up and leave. I cowered as I saw through a trial so I could talk to the animal control supervisor. I cowered as I told him about the t-shirt.  I cowered as I stumbled back to my car. I cowered as I tried, without success, to stop seeing the face of that snarling pit bull before me.

I cower still.

I am Yours, Lord.  Save me.