Sunday, July 19, 2015

Gritting my teeth...


I wouldn't mind a guillotine at the moment.  Anything ... anything to help with my head.  The migraine of Friday night ended.  I had a brief respite and now another headache is building and building and building.  To be fair, I believe that part of the problem is my glasses.  I just cannot see clearly at all. However, I am being very petulant about having to buy new glasses yet again.

Also, well, I just about had it yesterday. I decided that this current spate of misery is going to be my last, no matter what, and so I did not even take the micro-dose of Xanax.  Forget about the endless tapering.  I'm done.  Period.  And I'm just going to grit my teeth through however long it is going to take for my head to recover from the stupid, horrid, dangerous drug.  Seriously, if you have trouble with anxiety, never take Xanax.  If, and only if you absolutely have to, you have to take a benzodiazepine take the one with the longest half-life: diazepam.

Yesterday, I was struggling so much that I took a shower, put on my most comfortable clothes (a combination of clothing and pajamas), gave Amos a bath, and had sweet-smelling, swaddled, snoring aroma therapy for several hours.  Today, the first day after his bath, Amos is the most soft and fluffy dog in the universe, wafting lavender wherever he goes.

Yesterday, I also opened the blood test results.
Don't open your own blood test results.
Don't open mail you know will be distressing.

Several of the tests were abnormal, with many of those noting a risk of heart disease and cardiac failure ... well, I have been worried about that.  There was a genetic test, which I thought there were not any, so I am assuming the blood work cost will be sky high.  The test was abnormal, too.  And my B12 serum was sky high.  Several times the high range number.  If you Google about high vitamin B12 serum in blood work, the results are rather distressing.  So, basically, I upset myself with no recourse for explanation or reassurance until the 31st.  I knew better than to open the envelope.  SIGH.

In some random Internet wandering, I found two things that made me smile:





This is just plain awesome!  I mean, hilarious, really, and so very true for me.  I really cannot believe that so many years passed before I realized that I was an introvert and that there are oodles of folk out there who think just like me!

And then there was the BEST bit of humor I've seen in ages:




So, true!  See, grammar matters!!

No comments: