Wednesday, November 14, 2018

Another new normal...


I've struggled to remember about church on Wednesdays now that I am going again.  I struggle mostly because it is not uncommon for me to not know what day of the week it is.  Figuring that out takes a lot of work on my part.  And, once I've gotten it figured out, I usually have to figure it out more than once or twice or thrice during the course of the day.

I begged on Facebook for help remembering my CT scan appointment this afternoon, but no one did. After my treadmill torture, I showered and got into my pajamas for the evening ... though it was still afternoon.  I had forgotten church. I had forgotten my appointment.  I remembered both at the very last moment for being able to make it to the latter on time.

I was quite proud of myself for that.
But what do they say about pride?

When I went to check in, there was a slight problem.  I was a day early.  SIGH.  I just couldn't believe it.  This is the second time, now, that I have messed up one of my appointments.  Messing up my meds is yet another new normal, as is, I fear, tinnitus, from the CSF headache that I was plagued with following the spinal tap.  Those two go along with the new normal of the constant shocking in my hands, a reality that I've had to deal with for nearly 13 months now.

I have been a bit shell-shocked ever since I learned that I went to my appointment on the wrong day.  I just cannot believe that I made that mistake.  And I fear, deeply, what that might portend for me.

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