Saturday, September 27, 2008

I slept until 2:00 PM, let Kashi see to his needs, and dozed on the couch until 7:30 PM. Still, I feel tired.

Fancy kept me company during my nap. Kashi was curled up next to his couch instead of on his bed. He is still clingy and still limping. When he is standing, he barely touches his injured leg to the floor, and even then his leg trembles from hip to paw. It is most difficult not to worry about him.

B texted me to call her shortly after I awoke from her nap. Since she told me to do so after 9:00 and she was at the cabin, I was hoping for a game, since I was still feeling rather sorry for myself after a long week of fatigue, thankless work, the weight of not really being able to do my job, and worry about how to do this contract job with a whole week lost in an already near-impossible deadline. But that was not the case. B had sad news. Were I able, I would have jumped in the car and raced to her side to hug her, sing silly songs, and let her beat me at any game she wanted (well, she would have most likely not needed my assistance with the latter). All I could do was listen when she really only wanted to share her news, not discuss it. My own concerns paled before her sorrow.

After I hung up, I spent a long while praying for her and G and their children. I wanted to call her back and pray with her on the phone, wondering why I had not done so while we were talking. But I thought to do so might have been a bit intrusive on her moment.

Sometimes, it is not easy knowing how to be the best friend possible to someone who is such a blessing in my life. My attempts seem so feeble, often marred by my own decidedly strong opinions of what should and should not my the the world...opinions that oft leave me feeling alone and alien.

I love you, B.

No comments: