I had reached out to another pastor first upon a recommendation from Pastor D. I emailed, had Pastor call, emailed again, and then called myself. Although I had what I thought was a good conversation with him and he gave me his cell phone number for Bettina to use, he never responded to the three messages she left for him. That puzzles me to no end. I simply do not understand a pastor being too busy to help someone in search of an introduction to Lutheran doctrine and instruction in the Living Word. Moreover, I truly believe it is a bit cruel to offer to help, offer to come teach a bible study at her home, and then ignore her attempts to ask for help. Asking for help is not easy. Not at all.
So, I contacted Pastor W for help, he worked the confessional Lutheran brother network across several states and shortly had a second pastor email me. This time, I spent three days reading the pastor's entire blog and listening to all his sermons before girding my loins and trying again.
This evening, he is meeting with Bettina and her groom in their home, while her cherubs sleep upstairs. I have been praying that the time would be helpful for her and instructive for her husband.
The pastor was very kind to exchange several emails with me and does a fair bit of pouring-forth-the-sweet-sweet-Gospel. He does these podcasts that have really solid teaching in them, and as an outreach mechanism, have popular music in them that he uses to teach his lessons. I care not for that sort of music...but I admire the evangelical effort.
In some way, his intriguing modern outreach of a very liturgical, confessional church might be just the ticket for Bettina's husband. Or so I hope. In any case, she has found a nearby option for them should they choose to begin attending a confessional Lutheran church.
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Neither Christ nor the holy apostles preached in that fashion. When they had finished preaching, every hearer knew: He meant me, even when the sermon had contained no personal hints or insinuations. For instance, when our Lord Christ had delivered the powerful, awful parable of the murderous vine-dressers, the high priests and scribes confessed to themselves: He means us. When the holy Apostle Paul, on a certain occasion, had preached before the profligate and unjust Governor Felix concerning righteousness, temperance, and the Judgment to come, Felix perceived immediately that Paul was aiming his remarks at him. He trembled, but being unwilling to be converted, he said to Paul: "Go thy way for this time; when I have a convenient season, I will call for thee." But he never did call. He had heard the sermons suited to his spiritual condition, and Paul's well-aimed remarks had struck home. (100)
Timely coincidence that I had not been able to begin Walther's Twelfth Evening Lecture until tonight?
I was very, very uncomfortable in church Wednesday evening, feeling as if God was yelling at me from the pulpit, not hearing a mote of Gospel, being crushed by the Law from the reading of the scriptures to the sermon to the hymn. That discomfort and distress continued in the awkwardness of private absolution.
Forgiveness. I do not understand this. And I do not know where to turn for instruction.
Law and Gospel. I thought I was beginning to understand. From the sermon I heard, I realize I know nothing. Nothing. So disheartened am I.
In the fourth place, the Word of God is not rightly divided when the Law is preached to those who are already in terror on account of their sins or the Gospel to those who live securely in their sins. (101)
So, it was with a bit of disbelieve when I realized that this lecture is about how crucial it is that for bruised and wounded parishioners, burdened by their sin, only Gospel should be poured upon them, not one mote of Law should be spoken.
In the opening lecture on our series of theses we got acquainted with the six points of difference between the Law and the Gospel. They differ 1) as regards the manner of their being revealed to men; 2) as regards their contents; 3) as regards the promises held out by either doctrine; 4) as regards their threatenings; 5) as regards the function and the effect of either doctrine; 6) as regards the persons to whom either the one or the other doctrine must be preached. As a rule, point No. 6 is named last. The reason is not that it is less important; for this point introduces a different of especially great importance. It is this: the Gospel must be preached only to bruised, contrite, miserable sinners; the Law, to secure sinners. Inverting this order means confounding both and, by confounding them, co-mingling both in the most dangerous manner. ...To make a miserable, contrite sinner the subject of Law-preaching is to commit a grievous sin against him....(101)
Oh, how I crave Gospel.
Isaiah says, chap. 61, 1-3: The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me, because the Lord hath anointed Me to preach good tidings unto the meek. He hath anointed Me to preach good tidings unto the meek. He hath sent Me to bind up the broken-hearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and the openings of the prison to them that are bound; to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn; to appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness.
The phrase "day of vengeance" does not signify a day of judgment on men; for to proclaim such a day would not be proclaiming an acceptable year. The meaning is this" The Son of God meant to take vengeance on Satan, who had hurled the human race into misery. For this reason the proclamation of "the day of vengeance" is a cheering, comforting message to us. If God had not avenged our Fall upon Satan, we should be lost. If Christ had not redeemed us from the Devil, we could not rejoice, but would remain in sadness. The picturesque phrases which follow in this text must all be understood figuratively, as pointing to spiritual gifts of grace.
These texts show us that according to God's Word not a drop of evangelical consolation is to be brought to those who are still living securely in their sins. On the other hand, to the broken-hearted not a syllable containing a threat or a rebuke is to be addressed, but only promises conveying a threat or a rebuke is to be addressed, but only promises conveying consolation and grace, forgiveness of sin and righteousness, life and salvation. (101-102)
Not a syllable. I can agree with this for I see Law everywhere. I even see it in this lecture. But first the example of Christ. Walther points out how Christ followed these very pattern:
- A woman who was a sinner washed Christ's feet with her tears and dried them with her hair. She was crushed by her sin when she came to Jesus and He offered her not one word of rebuke, only forgiveness.
- To Zacchaeus, the nefarious publican who had cheated others, Christ came to his house and proclaimed a day of salvation.
- In the parable of the prodigal son, Christ tells of a father who spoke not one word of rebuke to his son who had wasted everything he had with harlots, but instead welcomed him with utter joy and unconditional forgiveness.
- Even on the cross, Christ offered no rebuke to the criminal whom he hung next to for the man was contrite and asked to be remembered when Christ came into His kingdom; He offered forgiveness once more.
The practice of the holy apostles was identical with that of the Lord. You will recall the incident of the jailer at Philippi. He was on the point of committing a shock deed, the mortal sin of suicide, when Paul called to him: "Do thyself no harm, for we are all here." All through the night he heard Paul and Silas singing praises to God. No doubt a new knowledge had begun to dawn on him. When he heard Paul's warning cry, he called for a light, came trembling and, falling down before Paul and Silas, said: "Sirs, what must I do to be saved?" They do not tell him of a number of things that he will have to do first, for instance, to feel contrite. They simply say to him: "Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved and they house." They simply invite him to accept the mercy of God; for that is what faith is--accepting the divine mercy, or grace. (103-104)
Much of the lectures is a letter Luther wrote to a dear friend who was struggling mightily with a sin he had committed. Before I get to what I "hear" as Law that I have failed miserably, I shall give what I thought was the most gracious reminder:
It seems to me, my dear Spalatin, that you have still but a limited experience in battling against in, an evil conscience, the Law, and the terrors of death. Or Satan has removed from your vision and memory every consolation which you have read in the Scriptures. In days when you were not afflicted, you were well fortified and knew very well what the office and benefits of Christ are. To be sure, the devil has now plucked from your heart all the beautiful Christian sermons concerning the grace and mercy of God in Christ by which you used to teach, admonish, and comfort others with a cheerful spirit and a great, buoyant courage. (106)
I would have stopped there, but Luther then says the other reason Spalatin was so despondent could be that hitherto he had only imagined himself to be the barest of sinners.
It is bad enough to know that you made a mistake in this matter. Now do not let your sin stick in your mind, but get ride of it. Quite your despondency, which is a far greater sin. Listen to the blessed consolation which the Lord offers you by the prophet Ezekiel, who says, chap. 33,11: 'As I live, saith the Lord God, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but that the wicked turn from his way and live' Do you imagine that only in your case the Lord's hand is shortened? is. 59,1. or has he in your case alone forgotten to be gracious and shut up His tender mercies? Psalm 77,10. Or are you the first man to aggravate his sin so awfully that henceforth there is no longer a High Priest who can be touch with the feeling of our infirmities? Heb. 4,15. Do you consider it a new marvel when a person living this life in the flesh, with innumerable arrows of so many devils flying about him, is occasionally wounded and laid prostrate? (105)
That's rebuke if you ask me. Walther even notes Luther was telling Spalatin that despairing of God's mercy is always the most horrible sin, because it means that we declare God to be a liar. (105) An admonition that is oft repeated throughout the Large Catechism. But...if you are in the clutches of Satan, doubled over with a fiery arrow piercing your abdomen, how can you remember the mercy of the cross?
Oh, my struggle is surely a fetid, putrid, noisome miasma filling God's nostrils! I hate that I struggle so when Christ is standing before me in grace offering love and forgiveness through His mercy.
When Luther himself was in despair, Dr. Staupitz comforted him by telling him that he would have to get used to the fact that he is a real sinner, not a painted one, that Christ is a real savior, not a painted one.
For God is neither jesting nor dealing in imaginary affairs, but He was greatly and most assuredly in earnest when he sent His own Son into the world and sacrificed Him for our sakes, etc. Rom. 8,32; John 3, 16.
I know, Luther! I know this is real, the cross is real and great, larger than anything in all of creation. This I know.
These and similar reflections, drawn from consolatory Bible-texts, have been snatched from your memory by the accursed Satan, and hence you cannot recall them in your present great anguish and despondency.
Oh his fiery darts are raining down, piercing me from head to toe, a relentless rain of terror.
For God's sake, then, turn your ears hither, brother, and hear me cheerfully singing--me, your bother, who at this time is not afflicted with the despondency and melancholy that is oppressing you and therefore is strong in faith, so that you, who are weak and harried and harassed by the devil, can lean on him for support until you have regained your old strength, can lean on him for support until you have regained your old strength, can bid defiance to the devil, and cheerfully sing: Thou hast thrust sore at me that I might fall; but the Lord helped me.' Ps. 118, 13. Imagine now that I am Peter holding out my hand to you and saying to you: 'In the name of Jesus Christ, rise up and walk.' Acts 3,6. For I know I am not mistaken, nor is the devil talking through me; but since I am laying the Word of Christ before you, it is Christ who speaks to you through me and bids you obey and trust your bother who is of the same household of faith. It is Christ that absolves you from this and all your sins, and I am a partaker of you sin by helping you bear up under it. (107)
Oh, how I miss Pastor D singing to me. It is a great comfort, a true consolation, Lutheran hymnody. Tis a wondrous balm to have an undershepherd sing over you, offering such truth against the onslaught of the lies of our adversary.
I admit that I found that last part a bit confusing...until I turned the page. There, I read something I had not understood about private confession/absolution.
When a minister absolves a person who has confessed his sin to him, he takes that sin of the other on his own conscience. He can cheerfully do this, for the party that came to him to confess perhaps the most horrible sins came with a bruised heart. He may cheerfully pronounce absolution to such a person and say: "I shall assume the responsibility for what I am doing, for I know that on the great day of Judgment Christ will say to me: You did right; for he came to you with a bruised conscience, and it was proper that you ministered the Gospel to him. (108)
Taking my sin...that is food for thought. It makes sense, though, since the pastor is acting in the Office of Christ.
Then came the most comforting and distressing portion of this lesson.
Therefore, my dear brother, learn Christ--Christ crucified. Learn to sing praises to Him and to despair utterly of your own works. Say to Him: Thou, my lord Jesus, art my Righteousness; I am Thy sin. Thou has taken from me what is mine and hast given me what is Thine. Thou didst become what Thou wert not and madest me to be what I was not.
Beware of your ceaseless striving after a righteousness so great that you no longer appear as a sinner in your won eyes and do not want to be a sinner. For Christ dwells only in sinners. He came down from heaven, where He dwelt in the righteous, for the very purpose of dwelling in sinners also. Ponder this love of His, and you will realize His sweetest consolation. (110)
Christ dwells only in sinners. What a thought. What a magnificent, freeing thought!
Earlier, when Luther was addressing Spalatin, he wrote, Therefore my faithful request and admonition is that you join our company and associate with us, who are real, great, and hard-boiled sinners. (106)
That is one part of Luther himself and the Lutheran confession I find most satisfactory: the unvarnished bald truth. I am a miserable, wretched sinner. There is no getting around that. Knowing I am, knowing Christ still died for me, makes the Gospel all the more sweeter, so magnificent I can barely think of it.
Yet...I struggle with my sin and my shame, harder now, that I understand the struggle is a stench to God, that I am declaring Him a liar day after day after day, when all I long to do is sing His praises for all that He has done for even one such as I.
All these years, I have known the forgiveness of Christ as mere fire insurance, a great work to be sure, but a work then, not now. Oh, how I long to know Christ crucified, the Christ who is forgiving me each day, washing me anew in the water of my baptism and in His body and blood each time I approach the alter.
Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief!
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