This day has been so long and yet I have more work to do. Feeling rather desparate about how I am to finish, I called Pastor D. Funny, none of our conversations lead where I expect them to, but they continue to give me glimpses into the grace of God.

Tonight's revelation: I am laying down my life for my boss.

That's quite a different perspective that what I have had, struggling with how I feel as if the time I have left with my faculties primarily intact is being wasted.

"Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one's life for his friends." John 15:13

Pastor D explained that laying one's life down does not necessarily mean to die. Each time I set aside my own work and further hers, I am laying down my life. Each time I swallow my hurt at her criticism and respond in kindness, I am laying down my life. Each time I Google something, fetch her lunch, hole punch papers, or type up text for her, I am laying down my life.

What a shift! Truly the conversation sobered me and yet brought such freedom to my heart. I am not a failure professionally, I am actually a success in that I am laying down my life again and again and again. And in doing so I have to opportunity to learning more of God's grace and what it means to be truly humble. Wow. With such a perspective, to gripe about my frustrations at work now seems cheap.

I can hope that with this gift of such insight I might find greater peace with my working situation and bring greater glory to God at the office.

For now, I have many, many hours to go before I can sleep. The movie is not yet finished and the slide show needs a few more tweaks.

Still, I am rejuvenated by such a concept and am thankful for Pastor D and how he patiently shares the Word of God with me.