I spent the entire night in the ER. 

This time, I did not try to call anyone.  I think it made the loneliness easier to bear, not hoping and then being disappointed.

The hardest part was seeing the look on the nurses faces when they were pushing my hair back out of my face and it came away tangled in their fingers. 

Even though I would rather crawl into bed, I have changed out of my clothes soaked by my struggle to breath and have readied myself for work.

My clothing that is.  Right now, I am trying to ready my heart...to write here, to admit that this is my life, to accept it.