Friday, February 23, 2007

This day was a bit overwhelming to me. B is so peaceful to be around. She is kind and gentle, a constant encouragement to treat those around me with the grace of God.

B and her husband had decided to bless me with assistance this month, and so the day entailed visiting several stores to purchase cleaning products, household items, and much welcomed groceries, things that are a treat for me after economizing my food. One example: for the first time since I was fired, I indulged in sliced meat from the deli counter. They also gifted me with a couple of items that are sheer luxury, a beautiful tank top for sleepwear, some color for my hair, and a small travel cosmetics bag. She also treated me to lunch at a restaurant as they had the day before.

At each stop, when she pulled out the credit card, I struggled with the largess of her gift. In many items, I am set for the next month month, especially cheese! I also have all the cleaning products I need to stay on top of having my home ready for showing to prospective buyers. As we were shopping, B encouraged me to think about what I needed or what sounded attractive to me rather than what was the most frugal.

I am not sure if they understand what this gift means to me, going into the last two weeks of unemployment and facing the transition of a move. When I think about the move, I am excited for the possibilities and fearful of all the work and costs it will entail to move to a place without a job. I have been trying not to think even as I am working on making plans to move forward. Needless to say, I have yet to find that balance.

Today, I felt as if B spent the whole day with her arms wrapped around me telling me that everything would be all right. I know their intention was to help with my expenses, but today I felt as if it were so much more.

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