I feared the cabinets over my stove were separating from the wall, so I called my writing student's parents for help. To my pleasure, they both came over this evening to secure my safety. Her father added a couple of long screws and secured a few others. It still looks as if the cabinet is falling, yet it is quite attached. Perhaps the wall is just that crooked.

While he was here, I also asked her father if he would open a window for me. I had tried several times and only ended up with very, very sore muscles in the front of my shoulders. Her mother tried while her father was working on the cabinet, but it really was stuck. I had discovered once the cold weather had finally started that the storm window was still up. I discovered so because of the cold air wafting through the old window.

He planted his feet firmly below and with a mighty shove opened the thing. I pulled up the screen, down the storm window, and down the screen rather quickly. I was thinking that I might need his help closing the window, but I didn't. Already I can tell a tremendous difference in room. I even think Kashi notices the distinct lack of arctic draft.

Their visit was such a strange, strange contrast the phone calls I had just had with my brother and sister. I had asked both of them if they would canvas their friends to see if any of them (or their families) knew a good place where I might relocate, a place that: is in a cold climate, has a reasonable real estate market, is large enough that I could find at least an office administration job, and preferably near a college or university in the hopes I might teach a night class eventually. Both my siblings managed to criticize my job search efforts, my financial worries, and my relocation plans. My sister even managed to belittle again the struggle I have with multiple sclerosis and the heat. Her comment: "It's not too hot for you in Dallas, but the pollen would be hard on you." My allergies are consideration by my neural degeneration is but a piffle! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why? Why can't just one person in my family stand behind me? Why could someone say, "Well, if this is what you believe you should do, then I'm behind you. How can I help?" Or, how about "I know a move like that would be scary, but you are smart and capable and I am sure that you can do this and do it well."

Ah...but why should I ever suspect anything but criticism and derision? None of them value either the work or the accomplishment of my doctoral degree. None of them ever ask me about my writing. None of them ever ask me about my health. Who I am does not really matter.

Almost as if it were a response to those calls, I had a massive asthma attack this evening. I am not sure why since there was no significant trigger to which I could assign blame. However, I did spend the past month taking my asthma medicine every third day because the prescription wasn't ready before the new year and the "new" deductible requirement and I "rationed" the rest of last month's dosage.

I used the nebulizer three times, but I am still a bit short of breath. I suppose I will be sleeping in the green chair.